Childhood experiences around money often leave a lasting imprint, shaping how people view security, success, and even relationships later in life. Speaking about his early years, actor Varun Dhawan shared that his upbringing was rooted more in emotional warmth than material comfort. He said, “ as compared to wealth (I received a lot of love in childhood compared to wealth). Because we were not very well-to-do as we became later. We were very lower middle class because my to that level.” His recollection highlights a period when financial constraints coexisted with a strong sense of family bonds.
He also spoke about how day-to-day life was shaped by his father’s demanding work schedule and the uncertainty that came with it. “ (Make me sleep on bed or floor), it didn’t matter. (Papa wasn’t at home much). He was working around the clock, doing 2 movies at a time.so you have to cut down on your expenses (My mother used to say, ‘The food you’re eating is because your father is working and earning for it,’ so we often got to hear dialogues like that. Or if one of his films didn’t do well, it would be like, ‘Your dad’s film hasn’t worked, and now we don’t know what he’ll do next, so you have to cut down on your expenses).”
This raises important questions about how such experiences influence a person’s mindset, sense of stability, and relationship with money as they grow older.
Counselling psychologist Athul Raj tells indianexpress.com, “In many lower middle class homes, a child learns about money without anyone spelling it out. It sits in the background of daily life. A purchase delayed, a conversation cut short, a visible shift in a parent’s mood after a setback. The child registers all of this quietly. Over time, they begin to adjust themselves. They ask for less, they become more watchful, more accommodating. There is an early understanding that comfort is not guaranteed, that it can change.”
“In my sessions, this often comes up much later, not , but as a lingering discomfort around ease,” mentions Raj, adding that even when life is stable, there can be a sense that it may not last. Some respond by holding on tightly, others by trying to create ease through spending. But in both cases, the response is shaped less by the present and more by what was felt growing up.
Children are capable of understanding limits. Raj explains, “What affects them more deeply is the emotional climate in which those limits are communicated. When a parent can say that things are tight yet still maintain a sense of steadiness, the child adjusts without feeling unsettled. They learn that resources may fluctuate, but safety remains. That can build a grounded sense of responsibility.”
Reframing starts with recognising where this comes from. Most people are not reacting to money as it is today, but to what it once meant.
“In my sessions, this shows up as a constant need to stay prepared. Even when things are stable, there is an expectation that something could go wrong. The ; it is psychological. It involves noticing these patterns and questioning if they belong to the present.
Change happens in small shifts. Spending without overthinking it, allowing ease without immediately doubting it. Over time, money stops feeling like something you have to guard against all the time,” concludes Raj.
