Actor Surveen Chawla recently opened up about an unsettling experience, revealing how a well-known director tried to kiss her after a professional meeting. What makes the incident even more disturbing is that the director was aware that she was recently married and had discussed it during the meeting.
Sharing the incident in an interview with , Surveen said, “I will tell you a tale about ’s Veera Desai Road only. After the meeting at his office cabin, he came to see me off at the gate, and this was after I got married. And the strange thing was that we talked about this in the meeting also, he asked me how it was going and what my husband did, and it was just us speaking inside his cabin because he had a big office.”
She added, “So, when I opened the door and he leaned towards me trying to kiss, and I literally had to push him back and said, ‘What are you trying to do here?’ Walk off dude. My instant response was, ‘What are you doing’. I just walked off.”
Surveen, in an earlier interview, also from the South film industry, where a director communicated through a third party that she would need to sleep with him — highlighting how common it is for women to face such violations. “This was the code language, and I gave them the time to really say what I thought he was saying, but finally I asked him whether he was really asking that the director wants to sleep with me? ‘Sir, I am sorry you are knocking on the wrong door. I am not in for bartering myself in exchange for work’. I will never forget these lines,” she revealed. The actor had said that certain people “get you in this space where you question yourself.”
Counselling psychologist Athul Raj tells , “It’s a strange kind of shock when someone crosses your boundaries right after what feels like a normal, even respectful conversation. Then, suddenly, the person tried to take advantage of the situation. It’s confusing.”
He continues, “This confusion isn’t because you’re unsure what happened. It’s because your mind is trying to reconcile two very different realities. That gap is jarring, making you question yourself first– because that’s how many of us are trained. Women, especially, are , be polite, avoid rocking the boat, so when something crosses the line, the first instinct is often self-doubt.”
But here’s the thing: that doubt doesn’t mean you’re wrong. “It means the violation was subtle, maybe even cloaked in charm or casualness. This leaves us replaying every word, figuring out if it was ‘our fault.’ It’s not.”
Raj suggests, “First, you have to believe your feelings matter. You don’t owe an explanation for saying no or calling out something that feels wrong. You don’t need to soften it or justify it. Being calm and firm is enough.”
At the same time, he adds that , and that’s okay. Protect yourself quietly if you need to — keep a record, save messages, talk to someone you trust. You don’t have to face this alone or all at once.
“One of the strongest defenses is support — finding allies or mentors who can back you up. Even one person who has your back changes the power balance,” concludes Raj.
